iluvroadrunner6 | fandom weekly { 2021 } entry tracking part 3

Fandom Weekly part the third.

101 and we all lose our charms in the end | leverage | 617 **SECOND PLACE**
102 the choice is yours | dctv | 698
103 we got fun and games | original | 830
104 i've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed | leverage | 1,000 **FIRST PLACE**
105 never shall we die | original | 553 **FIRST PLACE**
106 harder better faster stronger | original | 971 **AMNESTY**
107 give me all of your prayers to sing | tvdverse | 929
108 it's who we're doing them with | original | 861 **AMNESTY**
109 friends are like an old shirt that always makes you smile | dctv | 879 **WINNER**
110 take a look, it's in a book | tvdverse | 997 **SECOND PLACE**
- - - AMNESTY - - -
111 wouldn't you like to see something strange? | tvdverse | 756 **WINNER**
112 let me know if you're really a dream | uncharted | 760 **AMNESTY**
113 winter wonderlands weren't made for one | tvdverse | 934 **AMNESTY**
114 you love how i keep you guessing | teen wolf | 942 **AMNESTY**
115 speak up, take a stand | dctv | 911 **AMNESTY**
116 stay alive until this horror show has passed | teen wolf | 842 **AMNESTY**
117 it's love that makes me walk way | everyone lives | 960 **AMNESTY**
118 and i'll be you | tvdverse | 898 **AMNESTY**
119 i hear your heart beat to the beat of the drum | teen wolf | 981 **AMNESTY**
120 there's no rescuing now because you're falling apart | dctv | 996 **AMNESTY**
- - - AMNESTY - - -
121 stuck in the real world, nothing comes free | original | 979 **FIRST PLACE**
122 i couldn't compete with the spell you were under | tvdverse | 561 **AMNESTY**
123 let my heart be the teacher | the magicians | 589 **AMNESTY**
124 you better trust me when i tell you | suits | 729 **AMNESTY**
125 say the word and i'm already there | teen wolf | 832 **AMNESTY**
126 the wheel is spinning me | marvel cinematic universe | 1,000 **THIRD PLACE**
127 it all started with a big bang | dctv | 667 **AMNESTY**
128 am i past repair? | tvdverse | 910 **AMNESTY**
129 it was lost long ago | dctv | 982 **AMNESTY**
130 and for you, darling, i'll hang the moon | teen wolf | 967
- - - AMNESTY - - -
131 i would never fall unless it's you i fall into | izombie | 680 **AMNESTY**
132 this is the life that we choose | dctv | 996 **AMNESTY**
133 no porch light on to pull me home | supernatural/tvdverse | 866 **AMNESTY**
134 i'll pretend my ship's not sinking | original | 607 **AMNESTY**
135 does the fun ever start? | tvdverse | 972 **AMNESTY**
136 play me time and time again | original | 997 **AMNESTY**
137 when i closed my eyes, i was so surprised | original | 765 **AMNESTY**
138 and the journey's been so rough | original | 935 **AMNESTY**
139 you think you're on your way | original | 840 **AMNESTY**
140 now the pain has cut too deep | original | 840 **AMNESTY**
- - - AMNESTY - - -
141 it's some kind of secret plot | wynonna earp | 710 **AMNESTY**
142 we could steal time just for one day | marvel cinematic universe | 824 **AMNESTY**
143 the dream is over | dctv | 990 **AMNESTY**
144 i'm a porsche with no brakes | marvel cinematic universe | 979 **AMNESTY**
145 tempted but the truth is discovered | leverage | 538 **SECOND PLACE**
146 your faith was strong but you needed proof | white collar/leverage | 984 **SECOND PLACE**
147 this time did it feel like thunder | wynonna earp | 753
148 this is one unhappy diva | original | 994
149 no medicine to procure | dctv | 821
150 it's just a jump to the left | paper girls | 998
- - - AMNESTY - - -
151 some things are meant to be wynonna earp | 882 **AMNESTY**
152 such a lonely word | supernatural | 683 **AMNESTY**
153 i breathe in on the tick and out on the tock | dc extended universe | 1,000 **AMNESTY**
154 just searching for a world with some soul | the umbrella academy | 630 **AMNESTY**
155 the past was much more fun | tvdverse/teen wolf | 942 **AMNESTY**
156 it took so long to leave | original | 560 **AMNESTY**
157 when you feel so tired but you can't sleep | tvdverse | 826 **AMNESTY**
158 had to get away | original | 642 **AMNESTY**
159 pressed between the pages of my mind | tvdverse | 542 **AMNESTY**
160 i've come to you 'cause i need guidance to be true | haven | 925
- - - AMNESTY - - -
161 if you still have a place for me | haven | 968
162 i'm not gonna stand here and wait | original | 632 **FIRST PLACE**
163 you say it's your birthday | original | 655 **THIRD PLACE**
164 i made this whole world shine for you | tvdverse | 709
165 what do i do when lightning strikes me? | tvdverse | 741 **THIRD PLACE**
166 the loneliest number that you'll ever know | teen wolf | 998
167 i know you've got your reasons | leverage | 830 **RUNNER UP**
168 maybe you've been watching me too | original | 915 **SECOND PLACE**
169 you can read me anything | original | 713 **THIRD PLACE**
170 oops there goes another rubber tree plant | original | 613 **THIRD PLACE**
- - - AMNESTY - - -
171 and you better come to play | the umbrella academy/marvel cinematic universe | 778 **RUNNER UP**
172 but you were history with the slamming of the door | dctv | 659 **RUNNER UP**
173 you got nothing to do and even less to lose | leverage | 721 **FIRST PLACE**
174 you got your head in the clouds | the umbrella academy | 662 **AMNESTY**
175 and i wish that love could save us | original | 846 **SECOND PLACE**
176 gravity is pulling me closer to your heavenly body | leverage | 713 **AMNESTY**
177 that you may be my problem not my love | original | 995
178 but your apathy is like a wound in salt | original | 798
179 they're calling you a fool | original | 845
180 careful what you wish for | original | 555 **FIRST PLACE**
- - - AMNESTY - - -
181 i can't be trusted around you | original | 667
182 you're just harder to see than most | original | 881 **FIRST PLACE**
183 send out the call and join the fray | original | 949 **AMNESTY**
184 gonna lure you into the dark | tvdverse | 706 **AMNESTY**
185 and i'm damned if i do and damned if i don't | tvdverse | 859 **AMNESTY**
186 won't you let me in? | tvdverse | 761 **AMNESTY**
187 you were only killing time and it'll kill you right back | teen wolf | 825 **AMNESTY**
188 say the world and i'm already there | tvdverse/teen wolf | 912 **AMNESTY**
189 let's not wait for armageddon | original | 607 **AMNESTY**
190 i can't think of what else i need to see | tvdverse | 780 **AMNESTY**
- - - AMNESTY - - -
191 as clear as the sun in the summer sky | marvel cinematic universe | 840
192 are you ready to watch me be legendary? | original | 585 **WINNER**
193 somebody's judgement was poor | original | 888

Part 2
Running Word Count: 73,858 words

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

“So, Lily. What brings you here today?”

Dr. Glass’s voice is a soothing balm, but for Lily it grates, like someone brushing her hair in the wrong direction. She doesn’t think that she of all people in this situation deserves to be stuck in anger management. She isn’t the one who cheated. She isn’t the one who gaslit her for months, claiming that she was imagining things.

“The honorable judge Henry R. Wallace.”

The therapist looks amused. “Why don’t we start from the beginning? How did you wind up in Judge Wallace’s courtroom in the first place?”

Lily’s almost certain it’s in her file, but she takes a deep breath and nods. Fine. She can explain it one more time.

* * * * *

Lily puts off the conversation with Julian until she returns home. She strides into what used to be their home, and now she doesn’t know how she feels. Julian isn’t here—his car isn’t in the driveway. But there is someone in their house. Someone not their dog.

She drops her keys down into the bowl near the door, and the sound brings the person in question. A blond woman with a bright smile. “Hi,” she begins. “You must be Lily.”

Lily’s heart pounds in her ears as she connects the dots on who this person must be. She’s here? What is she doing here? “And you are?”

“Mellie.” She holds up her hands. “I know how this looks, but I wanted to talk to you…”

“If you are who I think you are, you need to get out of my house.”

“But—”

“Mellie, I do not know what you want to tell me, and I don’t care. Right now, I just need you to leave before this goes a way we don’t want to.” Because she’s had enough time to think about it, she doesn’t want to release her anger in the wrong place. She also doesn’t understand this woman’s need to be here. Read the damn room.

“Are you—”

“Don’t push me.”

“Right. Okay. I’ll…another time.”

Mellie dashes out past her, closing the door behind her and leaving Lily alone in the house. She stares at the walls, at the art and sculptures scattered across the walls and tables, the fancy TVs, all the little pieces of décor and love that she’s put into the house over the years, and her eyes land on one vase that his mother bought them. The one that she insists be put in a prominent place, as a show of their love for her.

Lily hates that fucking vase.

Before she realizes what’s happening, her feet are carrying her across the floor. She picks up the vase, raises it over her head and smashes it to the ground. Everything about this day has felt so shitty, but that feels good, and suddenly she’s like an unleashed beast, craving more. She charges through the house smashing the art, breaking picture frames. All of their wedding china winds up smashing on the floor. Every piece of god-awful décor her mother-in-law forced on them is in pieces on the floor.

And by the time Julian arrives back at the house, the place is a mess and she has a plate in her hand.

“Lily. What the hell did you do?”

* * * * *

“And what did you do?”

Lily sighs, taking a deep breath. “I threw the plate at his head.”

“And you don’t think that was excessive?”

“He ducked.”

“That wasn’t the question, Lily.”

Lily crosses one leg over the other. Was it excessive? Maybe. Does she feel bad about it? No, not really. No harm done to any actual human people, just hurt feelings and broken glass. The broken glass can be replaced and if Julian and Jeannine didn’t want their feelings hurt, maybe they shouldn’t have lied to her for six months.

“I think when you’ve been told for six months that your husband isn’t cheating on you when he actually is, and that you’re crazy and making up evidence where there is none, you’re likely to snap when you find out the truth.”

“I see.” Dr. Glass looks at her watch. “Well, we’re out of time. But I’d like to pick this up again next week.”

“Fine.” Lily reaches for her purse and gets to her feet, but before she can reach the door, Dr. Glass speaks up again.

“Oh, and Lily? You aren’t crazy. And your anger isn’t wrong.”

“But?” There’s always a “but.”

“But I think there are healthier coping mechanisms. That’s all I want to explore here.”

Lily nods. In some ways, it’s good to feel validated. But she thinks that if they’re looking for healthy coping mechanisms, they’re going to have a long way to go.

fandom weekly { 2021 } entry tracking part 3

Part 2Running Word Count: 73,858 words

#178 ~ but your apathy is like a wound in salt ~ original ~ 798

Part 2
Running Word Count: 73,858 words